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Choosing A Spiritual Director



Finding the right match:

If you are curious about embarking on Spiritual Direction (Accompaniment, Companioning, Mentoring, Soul Friend...) we recommend you interview more than one Director. At that discernment meeting that person will learn about you and explore with you to find the right match for a spiritual direction relationship. The match process is important since different directors have different styles and strengths and different directees are coming from different places and seeking different things.


Questions to contemplate when seeking a Spiritual Director:

      What draws you to the idea of spiritual direction? Why now?

      What is your earliest memory of thinking about that which is greater than you/the holy/your purpose/vision/hope?

      How would you describe the most sacred/holy for you?

      Is your life a journey? Dance? Painting? Describe the scenery, colors, smells, feelings...

      What is your purpose/goal/hope in life?

      What is your spiritual DIRECTION?

Questions to ask a spiritual director:

Spiritual Directors International recommends you interview at least two prospective spiritual directors, if possible.  Most offer a 15 minute phone call and a free first "get to know you" session. Ideally, if you live in an area that has many available spiritual directors, it is best to interview at least three spiritual directors, using questions such as these:

      What enrichment, spiritual formation, and theological education do you have in spiritual direction?

      What is your personal experience tending your own prayer, meditation and contemplative or devotional life?

      What is your experience as a spiritual director?  How many years?  In what environments?  What are you most interested in spiritually? 

      How do you continue your education and supervision for your spiritual direction ministry?

      (If you are part of a religious community) What is your implied or explicit covenant with my Rabbi/Priest/Minister/Pastor/Spiritual Leader?

      What ethical guidelines do you abide by, such as those published by Spiritual Directors International?  Have you ever been accused or convicted of misconduct? What is our agreement regarding confidentiality?

      What type of covenant (engagement agreement) will we establish to clarify roles and responsibilities in our spiritual direction relationship?  

      What will you expect of me?